Surprise!

The faculty member was disappointed that the class did not seem prepared for the pop quiz.

Victory!

The student was ecstatic that the library had a copy of the $200 textbook for their class. 

Hm.

The professor had developed a pretty accurate BULL**** detector when it came to students giving excuses.

BONUS

One of the best parts of an assistantship in student affairs? A lifetime supply of branded water bottles. 

First Day

The students did not have a good feeling about this new faculty member.

Cutting

Even though there is more flexibility in graduate school, don't cut class. Like the old slogan says, "Don't cut class, cut grass."

"Actually, that's not an old saying and no one says it!!" you say?

You're wrong. I bet that was covered in class one of the days you skipped.

Go to class.

People

There are two kinds of people in graduate school - angry people and people who give you a milkshake. You can choose which one you want to be.